why have i abandoned this? hmm.. well, life generally continues to be shitty. since my last post, we came dangerously close to number five; living arrangements have become strained; shark has been increasingly hellish; and now even my friends hate me. im a selfish, obnoxious, self-centred bitch.. at the rate im going, im going to end up like vck: fat, and old, and despised by all.

weirdly, this has also been a great week: peel, stages, tango, all nighters with apple juice, and ass-croutons etc; all manner of bonding; 92, 88, and another 92; having loved and been loved;cleaning frenzies; and a wonderful bout of inspiration... i wouldnt trade any of that for anything in the world.

hopefully this second part will continue, and the first will drop off and die. hopefully a quick and easy death. all i need is a nice long cry.. why the bloody hell cant i cry? i need some sort of a catharsis.

for now, i'd settle for a nap.

damn internet connection.. damn family.. damn plumbing.. damn laundry.. damn dishes.. damn communication.. damn relationships.. damn hiding, lying, and sneaking.. damn mood swings.. damn house guests.. damn housework.. damn biology.. damn uncertainty.. damn economics.. damn hormones.. damn errands.. damn fear.. to sum it up in the immortal words of henry higgins, "damn, damn, damn, DAMN!"

but in the midst of everything lousy and rotten, i have a pretty, and fun, and REALLY cool (although mildly cheesy) present to work on! ONE mild reprieve out of a hellish existence. cant wait for reading week to be over so i can get out of this torture chamber. but all i have to look forward to is entering another one. joy!

im REALLY hoping that this is just PMS and not.. something else..

hmm.. it's been a very long time, hasnt it? typical of me. ah well, it's not like anyone reads this anyway..

so.. reading week.. and i've been playing the role of "mum".. only now do i appreciate how draining it is to have to drive around for hours and hours dropping off, picking up, and running errands. Hats off, mum! (Not, of course, that you'll ever see this!)

otherwise, life continues slowly, and i miss my key chain! i cant believe i lost my keys on the tricolour! im absolutely devastated..

that's it, i think.